You're Jokin'
by Crackpairingsarefun
Summary: Oogie has nabbed the wrong Santa.


"Well Well Wellll..." A booming voice came from the shadows. "What have we here? Sandy Claws? Ooh,I'm really scared!" A large figure, made entirely of burlap came from the darkness, large and intimidating to most.

But not to North. Nicholas St. North was not one to be taken lightly, so how he got down into this dreadfully dark layer a few days before Christmas was beyond him. No one dared take him for a weakling, and more often than not he could hold his own. So how in the name of the Man in the Moon did he end up here? The elderly gentleman frowned under his thick white beard as the large talking bag continued.

"So you're the one everybody is talking about? You're-" The bag cut off,getting a better look at the bearded gentleman. He may have been what one would call 'fat', but he hadn't expected him to be so... intimidating. He was tall, nearly as tall as him, and despite the heavy coat, he looked rather muscular. Blue eyes sparkled between a snow white beard and a dark furry hat,though these eyes, normally filled with wonder, were blazing in fury at the moment. North's captor took a moment to asses him, before stepping back. North took this chance to speak.

"Who are you?" The man placed his hands on his hips, eyes narrowing slightly. The opposite male seemed a bit surprised, the strange gap in what North assumed was his face turned into an upside down crescent. Ah,so that /was/ his mouth.

"I'm the Oogie Boogie man!" Oogie threw his 'hands' up slightly,still frowning. Most people would be shaking at his feet right now! He was /the/ boogie man! What was with this 'Sandy Claws' guy? North raised a thick brow.

"Boogie man? No, cannot be. " He shook his head. "I have seen Boogie man. You are not him." North said this in a matter-of-fact manner, with a small wave of his hand, as though he were brushing Oogie off. The proclaimed Boogie Man did not take this well.

"I am!" His voice boomed again, laced with anger. "I gamble with lives! I've terrified nearly all of Halloweentown! The world,even!" Yes, he was angry. He'd never met anyone other than Jack who just wasn't scared of him. Jack he could handle,but some fat old man he had never met? Oh no,no, no... Antsy, Oogie grabbed a lever nearby. "This chat has been /lovely/,but I don't enjoy talkin' with my food too long." He pulled, the floor beneath North quickly moving out from underneath him. North frowned, quickly moving before he fell into the strange,orangey substance below. He glared up at the strange creature in front of him,drawing the two swords he had in his belt. Oogie eyed them almost nervously, wondering to himself how he had missed those.

"I will warn you now. Release me or face the consequences, Bag man. The children are expecting me." North kept his blades pointed at the other, frowning darkly. Oogie grimaced inwardly.

"You must be joking,Old man. I hope this will shut you up,fella." With a flick of his nonexistant wrist, Oogie pulled another lever, his slot machines pointing their firearms in North's direction with a loud whir. North had barely managed to move out of the way, and /stay/ out of the way as they fired almost endlessly. He was certainly surprised. Pitch didn't fight like this, with guns and traps doors! It was foreign to him, though he had no choice but to adapt so he could get out of this lair as soon as possible. He had kept moving, but when he noticed the bullets were getting closer, that he had barely moved.

The floor was moving too! Thinking fast,North ducked,pressing himself to the floor, and it swung around quickly. North's eyes darted around for the creature that had captured him, and they soon rested on the overstuffed figure, behind the slot machines. Scowling,North jumped up as soon as the bullets stopped, lunging towards Oogie before he had the chance to pull another lever. Bringing his swords down on the burlap-made man,the blades quickly cut through the fabric, slicing Oogie into thirds. Bugs spilled out from the torn fabric,writhing on the ground in front of North's boots. North grimaced slightly, but shook his head and stepped over the mass of insects, crushing a few under his boots in the process. He sheathed his swords again,headed for the exit. This had been nothing but a waste of time.

"You are joking." He grunted,almost at the ridiculousness of the situation. "You are joking."


End file.
